One might call us accident prone, or clumsy. Personally, I would simply describe us as a disaster in the days before catching our flight to Vegas for Dana's Bachelorette Party. Of course, this is meant in the funniest way possible. Funny. Because people hurting themselves is always funny.
Kidneys are important for several reasons. So, imagine my surprise when 4 days before we're supposed to leave, the act of peeing became painful. Manda suggested I call the doctor. But what rational sense did that make? Really the doctor? Simply because it hurts to pee? Nah. That's a waste of 3 or 4 perfectly good minutes of my day.
What's that saying? Hind site is 20/20?
Two days later, intense abdominal pain finally prompted me to contact my doctor. Personally, I think he overreacted with the suggestion to go the ER. Really, it was just intense abdominal pain. Antibiotics would clear that up.
And they did. What I didn't see coming was my hip going out the very night I started the antibiotics. Yes, one day before our flight to Vegas. Despite the antibiotics, I still had pain while peeing because it hurt to sit down! I tried peeing standing up, but after having to change my socks 3 times, I just gave up on it. Women were just not meant to pee this way.
Two doctor visits and a muscle relaxer later, I found myself taking the puppies out to pee before we left for the airport. This innocent and often repeated act, took a turn for the worse when Garrison's retractable leash attacked me. Yes. Attacked me. Three of my much needed, and often used, fingers were savagely strangled and burned. It hurt. A lot. I screamed. But not a girly scream. I don't want you to get the wrong idea about me.
After throwing the leashes in Manda's direction, I limped, yes limped. (remember the hip thing?) back into the house, and stuck my hand under the faucet. I needed to put out the flames that were arching off my fingers. Unfortunately, *sigh* anyone who lives in Phoenix knows there is no such thing as cold water coming out of a faucet in the summer. Impossible. Not gonna happen. Please try again in 6 months.
At this point I was jumping up and down (This helps the pain. Try it. It works) yelling things I hope small children didn't here. This situation was serious. Thankfully, a firefighter (she was short, blond, really cute.) arrived with ice. It was from the freezer. It was perfect. The pain subsided. Temporarily.
For the next 12 hours, I walked around with an ice pack on my hand. If the ice melted, which it did on occasion, I would cry until additional ice was found. Yes. I was a baby.
Things couldn't get worse could they? Right. I'll let Manda take it from here.
Peace Out.
Lindsay
Kidneys are important for several reasons. So, imagine my surprise when 4 days before we're supposed to leave, the act of peeing became painful. Manda suggested I call the doctor. But what rational sense did that make? Really the doctor? Simply because it hurts to pee? Nah. That's a waste of 3 or 4 perfectly good minutes of my day.
What's that saying? Hind site is 20/20?
Two days later, intense abdominal pain finally prompted me to contact my doctor. Personally, I think he overreacted with the suggestion to go the ER. Really, it was just intense abdominal pain. Antibiotics would clear that up.
And they did. What I didn't see coming was my hip going out the very night I started the antibiotics. Yes, one day before our flight to Vegas. Despite the antibiotics, I still had pain while peeing because it hurt to sit down! I tried peeing standing up, but after having to change my socks 3 times, I just gave up on it. Women were just not meant to pee this way.
Two doctor visits and a muscle relaxer later, I found myself taking the puppies out to pee before we left for the airport. This innocent and often repeated act, took a turn for the worse when Garrison's retractable leash attacked me. Yes. Attacked me. Three of my much needed, and often used, fingers were savagely strangled and burned. It hurt. A lot. I screamed. But not a girly scream. I don't want you to get the wrong idea about me.
After throwing the leashes in Manda's direction, I limped, yes limped. (remember the hip thing?) back into the house, and stuck my hand under the faucet. I needed to put out the flames that were arching off my fingers. Unfortunately, *sigh* anyone who lives in Phoenix knows there is no such thing as cold water coming out of a faucet in the summer. Impossible. Not gonna happen. Please try again in 6 months.
At this point I was jumping up and down (This helps the pain. Try it. It works) yelling things I hope small children didn't here. This situation was serious. Thankfully, a firefighter (she was short, blond, really cute.) arrived with ice. It was from the freezer. It was perfect. The pain subsided. Temporarily.
For the next 12 hours, I walked around with an ice pack on my hand. If the ice melted, which it did on occasion, I would cry until additional ice was found. Yes. I was a baby.
Things couldn't get worse could they? Right. I'll let Manda take it from here.
Peace Out.
Lindsay